It is not blessed to give too much!

Marilyn and I have been in Turkey for three or four months. Mostly in a village named Kas ( Kosh) on the south coast. We make a life time friends here, but this is not about Tessie. It’s about how different customs are from here into central and eastern Turkey.

When it gets warm we start out on a two month swing that take us right up to the Russian border with it’s deadly looking watch towers eerie two hundred yards. This is where Marco Polo took off for China; at least that’s the myth. On the way we stop in villages, towns and a couple major cites. We ride around 1000 year old walls in donkey carts and stay in inns until we get to l Konya, the most conservative city in Turkey, in 1987. From here we across mountain ranges and stop to see underground cities, and visit mountain top tombs until we get to the furthest eastern city.

We’re really deep into the east and a different country. Two hours off the southern coast and you’re back in the 15th century. We had five scythe wielders, all pause as they cut an area slightly smaller than Maryland to doff their caps and bow as we drove slowly by. Or being told it was not safe to climb Mt Arart, so-called- sight of the Ark’s landing, because we could be attacked by wild dogs. And having people return objects we left on top of our van, and refusing a reward, even for a camera!

So we are walking around inn Van and a 12 or 13 year old comes and asks Marilyn if he can practice his English. He will show us around and there is no charge. Well, I tell her in the end we’re going to a carpet shop, and that’s correct. But he’s really nice and while we’re in the shop I mention that today in her birthday. MARILYN ALSO INSISTS THAT I TIP THE KID, WHICH I DO. Big mistake! He didn’t ask for one, but so it goes when you’re with my Dwarf.

Back in our hotel there’s a knock. The kid and his uncle are there holding a birthday cake with some unlit candles. She’s flabbergasted, accepts and thanks them. When they go she tells me she’s got to show how much she appreciated this I decide I m not going to warn her about Turkish customs. Marilyn doesn’t find out till later that her tip was used to buy the present.

So next day we show up at the shop with the cake, ice cream and cokes. We all have a slice and a drink. The uncle then runs out and buys some sweets and Marilyn . . .oh well. By and by we’re invited to dinner. I want to refuse, but . . . you got it. But I do tell her not to take anything except flowers, but she buys wine anyway. She’s far from being stupid. Just stubborn. When we arrive, we pull off our shoes and go in. There’s maybe ten people there. Four males and any number of female faces peering out of the kitchen. And the meal is four or five courses. I caution her to eat lightly and she does. But the six ladies who come out and stand with great respect watching us , helps me make my point. When we have finished our meal, I nod to the kitchen where the dishes have been carried. The ladies are now allotting the reminder of the food. Oldest the most and so forth.

So here’s the rule for Turkey, gang. You cannot give a Turk something and not expect something in return. Okay. But the Turk has to go last! Oh, and as a passing thought, these folks are really friendly. I mean honestly wanting to share their life styles and ideas. So if they invite you to share a meal with them, they pay. Be nice and pick as inexpensive a restaurant as they will allow. And another thing. If you’re a single traveling alone woman, Turkish males cannot take a seat on a bus or train beside you unless there are no other seats. Even then, they are not allowed to let any part of their bodies touch you. How’s that!