A Most Dangerous Road in South America

Marilyn and I have just come back from three years bumming Europe. After a couple months it’s off to South America, starting in Quito so she doesn’t have to duck bullets the first day. About a month later we cross into Columbia to see San Augustine, a very mysterious ruin in the Southern Columbia. To get there we go first to Popayán, and do the area. In the process, the Dwarf hears about the road to where I want to take her. Bus drivers race each other going down the mountain. “Señora, just a week ago a bus went off the side of the road, fell 300 meters in to the Magdalena River, killing forty two. Four were gringos,” the lady in the tourist office says.

Well first off, Marilyn doesn’t like mountain driving unless she’s at the wheel. And second she’s really skittish about sitting on the window side of busses going that way. So, we argue until we are having one of the best coffees in the world and she gets this from the owner. ‘There’s another road, but it’s very bad.’

“Bad,” the Dwarf asks. “How bad?”

“ The road is very bad. Lots of holes. The bus cannot go very fast. It takes twice as long. You go around the mountain that kills.’

Guess what? Guess which bus we took?

So the bus holds twenty people, all tourists, and the road is so bad the driver has to go very slowly! She’s in heaven. . .well until the back tires, both, blow out and guess what again? We sit under a banana tree while the driver hops a bus back to town with one tire. The other is in shreds. Oh, I forgot . . . There’s a fire fight going on between the police and drug dealers. Two helicopters hover overhead. Machine guns go rat-ta tat over an over. I don’t say a word.. I better not!

The driver comes back and we wind around the mountain, still climbing but the road is so bad, it’s like a turtle, and we only get up to nine hundred feet. Oh, the fight went on all around us until he reached the pass, and started down. I do admit, it was less steep then “The Road,” and unlike my other ventures to this area, we weren’t racing other buses to the next clients.

Let’s just say that San Augustine was all it was supposed to be, because this is not about a ruin. Maybe we can post a photo and give you reasons to go. It’s worth it. Unless you . . .well.
While there we meet an Israeli who will become part of our extended family in the Middle east. See? There are wonderful reason to travel and Tomer Zipori is one!

Different size bus, same route, different driver. We’re loaded. The little critters run up and down the aisles. Four legged ones and also two. Everyone passes food around. Smoking is allowed. The sun is out and the world is . . . All of a sudden we come to a halt which goes on and on. Oh, it’s getting warmer. Tomer asks what’s up and tells us,’ There’s a huge mud slide around the bend. He’s waiting for another bus. I envision one with huge tank tracks plowing through. Ha! Tomer finds out, the driver means there will be a bus coming the other way, and we can climb over the slide and take it back to Popayán!

I get out and walk around the bend. The slide is about fifty feet high. A lovely mountain of deep red mud. There’s no way to walk around. Off to the left you need a parachute and the right has a marsh that looks like the birth place for every nasty snake on earth.

So the diver calls out that the other bus is waiting. We all grab our bags, packs, satchels, native bolsas and start up. Easier said than done. My feet slide and sink. Two steps forward and slip back one and a half! Then I got a fifty pound pack on and if I’m not really careful, I’m going down backwards, with no steering allowed! I got Marilyn’s hand, more for me than to provide her any stability! Once we’re up, the real fun is sliding down on your butt in the nice red, slippery mud until you hit bottom. So it goes. And so it went. We all had a great laugh when it was over, and of course a memory that’s here for the rest of our lives.